I appear to have a pet spider living in my bathroom.

As a card-carrying arachnophobe, this would normally creep me out. But on general principle, even though spiders put the fear of God into me for no good reason, I usually don’t kill them unless absolutely necessary. I mean, any spider that’s going to be living inside, isn’t going to be a danger to me personally. Inside Spiders eat tiny Inside Bugs that otherwise try and eat my food. It’s the Outside Spiders that are known for devouring men whole. So, I definitely don’t feel justified killing in self defense.

Recently Heard in Class

Shiraki-sensei: What are some words that start with ‘X’?
Me: That’s tough. Well there’s xylophone, xenophobia…
Student: X-box!!!

And then there’s the fact that I like to think of myself as the calm little Zen center to the world and believe that it’s generally not a good idea to kill anything if you can help it, even insects, because a life is, after all, a life, regardless of it’s packaging.

But even the Taoist monk in me usually takes a holiday when the spiders invade certain spaces where I am required to be in uncomfortably close quarters with them (here’s a shot of the water closet from my apartment tour, way back when, just in case we’re not clear on what I mean by ‘close quarters’). Believe me, in any normal situation, this spider would be dead meat.

But I can’t do it. He’s just so cute. First off, he’s not huge, which is usually the first thing that’s going to get a spider whacked in my book. Long legs on a spider are the visual equivalent of instant, flattened death. This guy is one of those little jumping spiders, so he’s pretty tiny, and his legs don’t protrude too far out from his body (lucky him). And as I said, he’s a jumping spider, so he just spends most of his time hopping around. Not forward or here and there, just jumping up and down in one spot. It’s adorable.

Then there’s this preoccupation he seems to have with the water closet. He won’t leave. It’s small, as you saw by the picture so there’s not a whole lot to do in there. It’s not like I’m locking him in, because the door is always open. He just really seems to enjoy it in there, just hopping around, climbing up my stack of bathroom books then jumping off, taking a little spider nap on the rug, and whatever else he does. I’m telling you, he’s adorable!

I actually get worried now when I go in there and don’t see him right away. I mean, not a lot of bugs make it in there so I’m hoping that he’s finding something to eat.

Be sure to check back later in the week. I got a new cell phone and I’m dying to brag about it.

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